Just a girl trying to survive the nostalgia-induced feelz fest that is New Years.
I’ve made it a point over the years not to make resolutions. My contemporaries might use this opportunity for a fresh start to accomplish things like “losing ten pounds” or “practicing more mindful meditation.” I appreciate the concept of self-improvement, but my success rate at the follow through portion of resolutions is sitting comfy at a solid 0.0 percent. There’s no point in assigning more goals in my life when I can barely get a grasp of the ones that have followed me around for years, tormenting me with their unchecked and incomplete status.
This year is really no exception, except for the fact that I’m feeling nostalgic as hell and need to make a subtle change. I won’t be losing ten pounds. I mean, I might, but that happens naturally when I can no longer afford to buy groceries, not because of some moral obligation I made while wearing a sequin top and drinking André champagne.
Ya feel me?
This year, similar to year’s past, I’ve been obsessing over the details. The quick side-eye glances, interactions full of implied nuance, and obsessive analysis of the tone of a text message or email has left me feeling a bit frazzled, if not crazy as fuck. I’m feeling nostalgic for a simpler time.
And so I’ve made the resolution to zoom out.
If my life were a road trip, I’d play the part of the disheveled passenger hunched over the map with a magnifying glass, brow furrowed while trying to plot the route, acutely aware that I lost my deodorant 3 rest stops ago and can’t navigate the driver any more successfully than I could will my body to stop sweating. See! I didn’t even make myself the driver in an analogy about my own life! — That wasn’t working for me.
I’ve become too focused on the details to see the big picture.
Instead of agonizing over which path to take, I can simply zoom out and put that path in its rightful place as just one of the many choices I’ll make in my lifetime. And in my 26 (almost 27) years on this earth, I can’t pinpoint one decision that was make or break, and that’s a relieving realization.
So if you’re like me, and over-analyzing is like, your jam, don’t be afraid to zoom. I think you’ll marvel at the sight.